Another Love TKO

Having a spirit of unforgiveness is detrimental to our spiritual, mental, and physical health. When we don’t forgive and insist on holding grudges, we don’t hurt the person we don’t forgive or the one we’re holding a grudge against; we’re hurting our own selves.

Unforgiveness is detrimental to us spiritually because Jesus said, if we don’t forgive others; the Father will not forgive us! Think about it! There is no wrong anyone can do to us that is greater than the wrong we have already done to God! But those who are in right relationship with God have been forgiven of their sins and are forgiven by God on a daily basis! Therefore, when we refuse to forgive others, we are, in a sense, making ourselves to be greater than God!

Being unforgiving hinders our faith and prevents God from hearing our prayers! In Mark 11:22-26, Jesus makes the connection between moving mountains, receiving the things we desire when we pray and forgiveness.

Being unforgiving is detrimental to us mentally because strife, resentment, and other negative emotions that come with being unforgiving actually weaken and disempower us! They make us restless and angry, thereby inhibiting our ability to think positively and productively. When we refuse to forgive, we re-live the hurt over and over again in our minds; not allowing ourselves to emotionally heal.

Being unforgiving is detrimental to us physically because the doctors have discovered that our physical well-being is directly connected to our spiritual and mental health! When we are unforgiving for long periods of time, the resentment can manifest physically in the form of chronic high blood pressure, heart problems, cancers, and other health issues.

The bottom line is this; refusing to forgive is spiritual, emotional, and physical suicide! We don’t hurt the person we don’t forgive; but we are killing ourselves.

When someone has done us wrong, we’ve got to learn to forgive easily and quickly. Doing so doesn’t mean the person has taken advantage of us or walked over us; it means we are spiritually and emotionally mature and not spiritually and emotionally stupid! We would do well with a slight adaptation of the words of the late “Rev” Teddy Pendergrass: “We just need to let it go; it’s just another love T. K. O!”

 

 

 

Scabs and Scars

picking-a-scabSome months ago, I burned my arm while taking a tray out of the oven! Since it wasn’t a severe burn (in my expert medical opinion), I didn’t perform major surgery nor did I seek medical attention. I decided that since it was just a slight burn (I was only in contact with the hot spot for a milli-second!), I wouldn’t even put a Band-Aid on it; I would leave it alone and see how my body would heal itself.

Now, I’ve had burns, cuts, and bruises in the past and I would normally end up picking at the sore and making matters worse. But this time, I was determined to resist the urge to pick at it and allow the scab time to form and fall off by itself. And do you know what happened? Well, when it initially happened it hurt like the dickens! Then as time went on, it hurt less and less. Then, after some time, a puffy rising formed over the affected spot on my arm. Then the puffy rising went down and a harden scab formed. And then, after some time, the scab came off and while the spot of the burn no longer hurted or was even sore, there was a noticeable discoloration. Finally, the discoloration became less and less noticeable and the color in the spot returned to the point where it “almost” matched the coloring of the rest of my arm!

Now, I’m not telling you this to try to gross you out, but to relate to you that I learned a lesson from my burn. The lesson is that just as our bodies, if all things are normal, have the tendency to heal themselves (The purpose of medicine is not to heal or cure, but rather to assist the body where it is deficient in the process of healing and curing), so it is with life in general! There are a lot of people who think that life is out to get them or that they were “born to lose!” But that is not the case at all! Life is, in most cases, just like the normal healthy human body; when there is an injury, when something goes awry, life is healing and forgiving! Life is bent toward health, happiness, and healing!

But much of the pain we experience in life is not from our injuries, whether they be physical, psychological, or spiritual. Much of our pain comes from our tendencies to pick at the scabs and thus interrupt the healing process! For instance:  He’s already made it perfectly clear he doesn’t want you anymore! So why do you keep on pushing yourself on him; trying to make him change his mind? All you’re doing is just picking at the scab and not allowing the healing process! I know you loved your mother and her sudden death caught you and the rest of the family completely by surprise! But mother is gone and there is nothing you can do to bring her back! It’s been five years now; don’t you think it’s about time to pick up the pieces and move on? But instead, you are still grieving like it just happened last night! You’re bitter and angry with the rest of your family because they have moved on with their lives and you interpret their moving on as an indication that they didn’t love your mother as much as you did! No! All you’re doing is picking at the scab and not allowing the wound to heal!

But, even when do we allow time for the scab to form and fall off. And even when we don’t pick at the scab and allow time for the wound to heal, that does not eliminate the presence of the scar! As I am typing this very sentence, I’m pausing to look at the scar on my arm. The wound is completely healed! The scab is gone! It doesn’t hurt anymore! All that remains is the scar! In fact, if it wasn’t for the scar, there would be no trace of the injury! And as I look at other parts of my body, I can see scars, but I have forgotten what caused them!

The lesson in life is that once we have been healed of that psychological or spiritual wound and the scab is gone and all that remains is the scar; if we keep going in the direction of psychological and spiritual health, though the scars will always be present, we will even eventually forget the why and the what of the scars!  

My friend, no matter what you’re going through right now; be encouraged! Life is on your side! If you’ve been wounded or otherwise injured by the stuff that happens in life, be encourage! When the scab forms, don’t mess with it; leave it alone! That’s just life’s way of trying to keep the wound from getting infected! And when it’s all over and done, the only thing left will be a scar and if you just keep on going; you will even forget what caused the scar!